Well, after arriving at the DMs place, we were pleased to dip into the Red Red Wine, and watch in chop-licking
an
tici
...
......
pation
as
Beernut made his
JUMBOLAYA yet again!


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We wound up just chatting for alot of the time instead of getting the show on the road - which we might regret seeing as there was no game last week and there won't be one in the coming week!
extremely rare HQ collector's artwork, check it on eBay $50000 each.___________________________________________________________
Korisu had us laughing our guts out with his normal antics, and then after a very delicious supper at Agin's Inn (under new management) we hit the game finally.
So we were informed that for the leftover miles trekking to the village, we were beset by quick geurilla attack and fades to the point that we were now only 400 strong able-bodied men who entered and fortified the castle from the surrounding farmland. 1400 of the 3000 are dead. The rest are too wounded to fight. I (
El Flesh), felt a reactivation, a raising from miles behind us. The peasants and soldiers are fortifying the entrances as best they can; we know another attack is imminent. The hordes of Zarquon seem endless.

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An official, along with Merdou comes down the steps of the main keep, opening an official document, and declares our party of Heros under arrest - we are held responsible for the death of the Governor! It is signed and sealed with Mental's mark! As a perceived group of adventurers that are
not part of the army, we notice that we have been surrounded by our erstwhile allies. The peasants are fearfully prodding the ground with their sticks in a far corner of the wall, the men are on the walls, some of them looking down at us -many registering contempt, but some confusion, some sorrow for us and some....outright fear.
The mounted knights, however, are mostly fearless, and they have hemmed us within a circle. Thank Alchemy that my skeletons are much more intelligent now and kept under control.
Georgeous demands what we are being charged with in particular. As the charges are being laid out, the North Gate blows inward - several men dying instantly, many surrounding ones wounded with flying shrapnel. We are all knocked flat by the force of the blow, and many of the horses panic, running off before their knights can get them under control and charge towards the breach.

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Initiative roll sees a double sex,
SIX for
Korisu, so he is first to his feet. Alarm horns are blown from the other two entrances, which are also under attack now! In our haste to get in and fortify the castle we did not check the farms - the creatures were hiding by the dozens in there no doubt!

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Korisu runs through the charging horses to attack the invaders pouring through the broken doors! A lousy roll of 3 skulls makes a slim cut on an 10' towering Ogre. It doesn't even faze it. Next hit lightning pops its tooth, which it doesn't even notice! It really has not been hurt.
Korisu flees.

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Ninja now sprints in, hiding in plain sight. 5 skulls makes an effective backstab in another 10' Ogre on the other side of the column. His dagger sinks to the hilt in its back and it starts to turn.
Ninja knows he had better stay behind the enmy, and claimbs up its back, stabbing with his other dagger, looking for the sweet spot at the base of the neck. 3 skulls on a back attack means that he is holding on as it moves and thrashes, trying to get at him...
Georgeous hits the same Ogre in the mouth. He is bleeding from everywhere, still trying to get hold of
Ninja.

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Flesh blasts like a hurricane to the head official, grasping him with both hands by the lapels, holding him overhead and gazing up into his eyes...at a mind roll of 41 total, the official autofails with snake eyes and HIS eyes are therefore wide with utter shorts-wetting terror.
"
WHAT MORE IS ON THAT MESSAGE!"
"n-n-n-nothing more i
swearrrr..."
"
DO YOU INTEND TO ARREST YOUR SAVIOURS?!"
"NOOOOOOOO!! HELP US!!! SAVE US!!!"

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I send my army to the invasion. The bone Wizard makes an excellent 5 damage lightning strike (imagine "Golden Axe"). The skeletons are doing what they can, attacking at their utmost, Lord Boner making strong attacks; his double scythe whipping around in a deadly arc.

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Sunshine runs to the East wall, scaling it in a flash. She hits the Ogre
Ninja is on with a 3 skull arrow. The next one misses,next one skull bounces. The last one skull sticks in its skin.
The monsters have a turn before
Zebs! Our army is dying off; as it takes higher rolls for humans to defeat monsters. Lord Boner is attacked, and he makes a full counterattak on the Ogre, slicing deep into its Quadriceps. One of the Wizards bone knights is destroyed. The Ogre is fully concentrating on
Ninja, trying to grab him off its back, and misses.
Zebs turn finally, and he makes a cut on the Ogre that spills its guts out on the ground, still attached to its body. It doesn't even notice.
The next initiative roll has
Georgeous attacking a smaller Orc - 2 skulls cuts it in the neck and it dies. He next attacks with his 3-space magical extension Axe. It splits the next invader in two.
Zebs Zerx - cutting the entrails entirely off the Ogre he had already gutted. His dual wield brings a blade underneath its jaw and up through the pleasure centers in what it laughingly calls its brain. It dies of an
Ogregasm.

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As I departed for some more suds at this point,
Korisu took over the documentation scroll here:
It's my turn! (You are saying "I'm for real") Ninja asks me if I'm righting (deliberate mispell of the writing). People laugh as I read this out loud. Korisu chops head off Orc 7 skull. Zeb will pay more in cold, hard cash! And Beernut will pay him in pennies. Ninja is climbing an Orcs log without his hands. I need the most concentration when writing. Ninja is climbing a male Orc whom is large statured. Beernut corrects me, he is actually something else other than a large statured Orc.
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Take from it, gentle reader, what you can. I have returned with the beer and Sangrila at this point.

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We are pouring and drinking before I get back to writing:
The spear Orc spears
Korisu.
Sunshine kills the Caver Giant that
Ninja was on. NOW the cavalry panix and charges - trampling the heros from the rear!
Georgeous narrowly avoids the horses legs while rolling his tiny armor covered body, and is so enraged, he counter attax our own cavalry man, cutting the horse from chest to crotch!
I, (
El Flesh), defends so well I can counter if I wish - but being intelligent I allow it through. The Wizard Skel is bumped aside, but suffers no damage. My skels kill 4 monsters total. The Wizard, in particular, hits an Orc with lightning,which is then struck by the bone knight, detonating its head!

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An Orc trying to hit
Korisu from his right is cut instead.
Zebs blox the first attack on him. The guards and officials run into the keep, slamming and barring the door behind them.
Zebs utterly reaps a large opponent, then stabs its other hand.
Georgeous guts an Orc from crotch to ear.
Korisu kills his target, and
Sunshine shoots an Orc to death. Lord Boner has taken massive damage.

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We end the game after only three play turns. It is late and we are drunk.

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