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The Slave City - Revised

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The Slave City - Revised

Postby mikemacdee » Sunday October 20th, 2019 6:54am

Here's my first draft of the Slave City revision!

INTRO
You've been thinking about your Cousin Lyris a lot lately. It started with dreams of childhood--memories long forgotten. This led to a sense of longing, wishing for a reunion with that odd girl you grew up with. When last you saw her, five years ago, she was married with three children and living a simple yet idyllic life, she and her brood following her husband wherever he found work. It recently dawned on you that Lyris hasn't written to you in well over a year.

Then came the rumors about Makron, the city in the mountains to the north, just outside the empire's reach. You have never been to Makron, but you know that ever since General Rantler became its governor, the place has become a cesspool. Rantler's reputation precedes him: a despot of the worst sort, imprisoning men on false charges, then forcing their women to buy their freedom by spending the night with him. His social circle is a veritable rogues gallery of vermin and cutthroats, with the mad magus Grinlam recently counted among them. The vile wizard has been sighted more than once in the Slave City the last few months.

That is the new name Makron goes by under Rantler's reign. The Slave City, where everyone slaves in Rantler's mines, or serves his soldiers on hand and foot. And it's not gold they're mining, you hear.

As the stories trickle through your favorite taverns like bad ale, you grow more and more disturbed. You aren't sure why until the next dream: Cousin Lyris weeping, begging for help. You wake with a start and search the letters you've collected from her over the years, until you find the most recent one. Her husband was moving his family to Makron. That was a year ago.

The emperor's men cannot cross the border without inviting war from the sultans of the north. You decide to take matters into your own hands and gather your closest allies for a voyage to the Slave City. They can take all of Rantler's riches they can carry. All you want is to know that Lyris and her children are safe.


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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby mikemacdee » Sunday October 20th, 2019 9:17pm

I spent the day doing the revised questpack, and now it is available for testing. Check the original post.


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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby lestodante » Wednesday October 23rd, 2019 2:07pm

I was not sure you were referring to that questpack from Dragao Brazil... Did you change all the characters and the plot also?


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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby mikemacdee » Thursday October 24th, 2019 2:19am

lestodante wrote:I was not sure you were referring to that questpack from Dragao Brazil... Did you change all the characters and the plot also?

The villains are the same, but I fleshed them out more (the fight with Rantler is pretty grueling, in theory). The main plot is somewhat revised, but still centered on the bad guys mining ore and gathering components to make superweapons for an enchanted army. The flavortext on the whole was lacking. The monster selection and placement also felt pretty random for the most part, so i tried to give the impression of a more cohesive armada of humans and undead serving their respective masters in tandem.
Last edited by mikemacdee on Friday October 25th, 2019 4:36am, edited 1 time in total.


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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby SSDecontrol » Thursday October 24th, 2019 1:31pm

Thank you! Can't wait to play it.
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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby mikemacdee » Friday October 25th, 2019 4:50am

I just realized I didn't finish the final quest. :oops:

There was a typo in Quest 4 as well. Both problems have been fixed, and the pdf has been updated.


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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby SSDecontrol » Friday October 25th, 2019 1:30pm

Hey Mike, I noticed on your site that you also remade Kellar's Keep. What were some of the major changes you made?
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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby mikemacdee » Saturday October 26th, 2019 2:36am

SSDecontrol wrote:Hey Mike, I noticed on your site that you also remade Kellar's Keep. What were some of the major changes you made?

- Changed the story to make it more straightforward and coherent. It's basically a treasure hunt: assemble the map to find the safe route to Kellar's Keep, where untold riches lie waiting. Couldn't make heads or tails of the original story, and this seemed a bit more fun anyway.
- I made each quest less of a meat grinder, and set it up so that you can change the enemy races between quests to simulate other groups seeking the same treasure. Tried to give each quest a bit more character too (for example, the long stretches of dead-end corridors in one quest were boring and tedious, so I added boulder traps to keep the heroes on their toes).
- It's no longer a 10-quest slog with no armory breaks: I adapted an idea posted on the forums in the past and made it nonlinear, so the heroes can visit different quest groups in any order they choose, with each set ending in the recovery of a map fragment.


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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby lestodante » Saturday October 26th, 2019 10:13am

In KK the maps should be linear because they are following the path to open the road for the Emperor. So they do not have time to stop and go in some cities and buy additional stuff.


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Re: The Slave City - Revised

Postby mikemacdee » Sunday October 27th, 2019 5:45am

lestodante wrote:In KK the maps should be linear because they are following the path to open the road for the Emperor. So they do not have time to stop and go in some cities and buy additional stuff.

Yes, and I don't find a ten level meat grinder with almost no story fun at all. The expansions were rushed, and it shows.


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