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Against the Ogre Horde revised for HQ-HEROES & VILLAINS

PostPosted: August 31st, 2017, 2:08 pm
by knightkrawler
...and here's a 3-quest shortened version of Against the Ogre Horde.
I tried to retain the most interesting of the entire original pack in these three quests.

Re: Against the Ogre Horde revised for HQ-HEROES & VILLAINS

PostPosted: August 31st, 2017, 8:20 pm
by j_dean80
Mentor's address: "wide open fro more"

I assume it meant to say 'wide open for more'.

Re: Against the Ogre Horde revised for HQ-HEROES & VILLAINS

PostPosted: January 22nd, 2018, 5:46 pm
by Daedalus
A couple of komments:

". . . This could not have happened without the host
stationed there having betrayed and deserted. . . ."
This case of betrayed is a transitive verb that needs an object.

    noun
    noun: backside; plural noun: backsides
    1.
    informal
    a person's buttocks.
    2.
    NORTH AMERICAN
    the reverse or rear side of something.
    "the backside of the hill"
I don't know if it's intentional (or is it just me?), but definition 1 adds a lewd air to ". . . but its backside is wide open fro more to come . . ."

Re: Against the Ogre Horde revised for HQ-HEROES & VILLAINS

PostPosted: January 23rd, 2018, 1:53 am
by knightkrawler
Not even I am smug enough to do that intentionally. Thanks for reviewing, again, even if I'm not actively doing anything with the suggestions right now.
As always, I'll go through these threads for starting my revisions.